101sharequotes Quotes Topics Famous Occupations Motivation Inspirational Life Love Funny Success Friendship ☰

Bean 1997

Lt. Brutus: Mr. Bean, are you presently on any kind of medication?Mr. Bean: Not that I know of.Lt. Brutus: You certainly could use some.

— Bean 1997 present

David Langley: I must admit, over the time youve been here, certain... suspicions have begun to gather in my mind. Im going to be frank here... are you a doctor?Mr. Bean: ummm...[shakes head]David Langley: okay number two, do you know anything about art. I mean... let me see... was Leonardo Da Vinci a famous American basketball player?[sniggers]David Langley: [Bean looks confused, Davids face drops]Mr. Bean: ...yesDavid Langley: ...I see[brings his hand up to his face]

— Bean 1997 time

David Langley: Well sir, an unorthodox start; but I never expected things with a man of your calibre to be normal. I must confess Ive never actually read any of your work. Tell me doctor, what exactly is your position at the gallery?Mr. Bean: I sit in the corner... and look at the paintings.David Langley: Ach! That is brilliant! If only more scholars would do that, not lecture and write and argue, but just sit and look at the paintings themselves. Now that is brilliant.

— Bean 1997 art

General Newton: I dont know the difference between Picasso and a car crash.

David Langley: Why am I worried about this? You did it! All I gotta do is go tell em what happened. But theyll say, Who left him alone with the picture? And Ill say, Me. And theyll say, Youre fired and Ill say, Fine. Theyll say, No, no, no, firings not good enough. Lets prosecute you for negligence. I go to jail, my wife leaves me, my daughter becomes a prostitute, I wind up on death row sharing a cell with Butch McDick!

— Bean 1997 death

[after seeing what Bean did to the painting]David Langley: Oh Jesus! Oh God! Oh Jesus! Mary mother Jesus of Nazareth!

— Bean 1997 god

Lt. Brutus: Hes a genius, huh?David Langley: Thats what they tell me.Lt. Brutus: Well, he looks like a fruit cake to me.

— Bean 1997 genius

David Langley: Doesnt it take, like, five hours?Mr. Bean: ...not... necessarily

Bernice Schimmel: I genuinely believe that we could get Jon Bon Jovi.David Langley: Jon Bon Jovi? To unveil, Whistlers Mother?Bernice Schimmel: Yes.David Langley: Ive got nothing against Jon Bon Jovi. The man has had two great hairstyles in the last ten years, which is an achievement not to be sniffed at. But so far as I know, Mr Jovi knows absolutely nothing about 19th-century Impressionism.

— Bean 1997 men

[David and Bean are outside the exhibition room; David is miserable]David Langley: Say, do you drink, Bean?Mr. Bean: No.David Langley: Good, neither do I.[the two men head off to a bar]

— Bean 1997 men

[Mr Bean and David are walking home drunk]Mr. Bean, David Langley: [singing while intoxicated] yow, row, row your boat, gently down the stream. If you see a crocodile, dont forget to scream.[Bean screams]Mr. Bean, David Langley: Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream. If you see a crocodile, dont forget to scream.[both scream loudly when they approach the front door to Davids house to find Davids wife, Alison already home]

— Bean 1997 sin

David Langley: Ive given my life to art and from here on in, the only art I will get anywhere near are the pictures I draw on the pavement hoping passersby will throw nickels in my hat. I guess the long on the short of it: I wish Id never been born.

— Bean 1997 life

David Langley: Come on, everybody, its gonna be great! Dr. Bean is a genius of the very highest order!

— Bean 1997 body

Mr. Bean: [at the virtual rollercoaster ride talking to David] Brace yourself!

— Bean 1997 self

Kevin Langley: Hey, whats wrong with Meat Loafs butt?

— Bean 1997 wit

Kevin Langley: I cant sleep. I cane stop thinking about naked women. What about you?Mr. Bean: Whistlers Mother.Kevin Langley: Well, whatever turns you on!

— Bean 1997 women

Share your thoughts on Bean 1997 quotes with the community:

Next

Maybe you are looking for Bean 1997 quotes, Bean 1997 sayings?

Here are quotes most suitable for various topics. In the web you can find use by keywords: quotes Bean 1997 Bean 1997 quotes Bean 1997 sayings Bean 1997 famous quotes Bean 1997 best quotes