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Freddy Got Fingered 2001

Gord Brody: [playing the sausage organ] Daddy, would you like some sausage? Daddy, would you like some sausage?
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 age
Jim: Ohhhhh, look honey, our boys a genius! Hes rigged a pulley system so he can eat sausage and work on his stupid drawings.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 work
Gord Brody: I wanna eat chicken burgers.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001
Gord Brody: Look, Daddy, Im a farmer.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001
Julie Brody: Gordie, sit down. Were having roast beef.Gord Brody: Why do you guys always have roast beef?Jim: Boo-hoo. Little Lord Fauntleroys tummy hurts because theres too much roast beef in it.Gord Brody: Its just boring.[Opens bag, pulls out a chicken sandwich]Gord Brody: Im eating a chicken sandwich.Jim: No, youre not!Gord Brody: This is crazy. Im a 28-year-old man, I should be able to eat a chicken sandwich if I want.Jim: Hes 28 years old and he can eat a chicken sandwich. Very Impressive. Mike Fitzgibbons son is a nuclear physicist, and my son can eat a chicken![Grabs chicken sandwich, throws it to the dogs]Julie Brody: Jim, no!Jim: You can either eat that goddamn roast beef, or you can go to bed.[Gord leaves the room]
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 god
Jim: Wait a minute... Youre crippled.Gord Brody: Dad...Betty: What?Gord Brody: Dad...Betty: You got a problem with my legs?Jim: No, you got a problem with your legs. Its ether that, or youre just lazy.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 you
Sandwich Customer: This cheese sandwich.Gord Brody: What?Sandwich Customer: It doesnt have enough cheese in it.Gord Brody: Well... we cant have that, cause, you know, a cheese sandwich with no cheese, its just... two pieces of bread, and you know what? I could LOSE MY JOB. I could lose ALL THIS.[starts cramming all the cheese slices on the counter into the sandwich]Gord Brody: So you can... have... all... the cheese... you want.[throws the stack of cheese slices and bread at the customer]Sandwich Customer: What the hell do you expect me to do with this?Gord Brody: Well, I dont know. You could... SHOVE IT UP YOUR BUM-BUM.[customer walks out disgusted]Gord Brody: Yooou... can... put... the... cheeese... in... your... bum...
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 art
Gord Brody: [Dressed in his fathers suit, back to front] Im the backwards man, the backwards man, I can run back as fast as you can.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 war
Gord Brody: Hi. How are you?Betty: Id be a lot better if youd smack my legs with this bamboo.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 you
Gord Brody: [playing violin wildly] This is a fancy restaurant. This is a fancy restaurant.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 wild
Jim: Hey, Gord, the water cold enough for ya?[Turns the water temp level down, then breaks into the bathroom, then flushes the toilet]Jim: Dont tell me this boys so stupid he doesnt know the difference between hot and cold.[opens shower to find Gord with a soap on a rope in Scuba Gear]Jim: Hey, what are ya doing in my scuba gear?Gord: Look, I found a treasure.Jim: Thats a soap on a rope!Gord: SHhhhhhhhhh, Im pretending its a treasure.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 ya
Jim: [after he leaves Gord in the shower] You retard!
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 you
Jim: You want Daddy to give you a spanking in front of his retard slut whore?Betty: IM NOT RETARDED!
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 you
Gord Brody: I hope I get a jobby, Freddy. Ive got my fingers crossed... crossed... crossed... crossed... cross... ed.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 hope
Gord Brody: Wow... its a Le Baron.Jim: Bet your boots its a Le Baron. Good car. Convertible.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 good
Gord: Dont touch my shoulder, I saved the day.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 day
Betty: But Gord, I dont care about jewels, I just want to suck your cock.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 you
Gord Brody: Japan Four.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001
Gord Brody: Ding dong! Im a sexy boy!
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 sex
Jim: Get out of the toilet!
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001
Gord Brody: You cant hurt me, not with my cheese helmet!
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 hurt
Gord Brody: Theres my La Baron. Wheres your La Baron?
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 you
Gord Brody: I see the problem here. Theres a baby in your body.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 body
Jim: You BETTER run. You LIIIIIAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRR.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 you
Harry: You hear the funny sound? You hear the funny sound? Its my hooves. Its my hooves.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 funny
Jim: [to Betty] If this was Pakistan, youd be sewing soccer balls.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 you
Gord: Daddy, were in Pakistan. Lets sew some soccer balls.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001
Gord Brody: Hes a molester! Hes a CHILLLLLLLLD MOLESTER!
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001
Andy Malloy: Can I really have a piece of cake, Daddy?Mr. Malloy: Sure you can, son. Its your birthday!Andy Malloy: Yea!Mr. Malloy: Yea!
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 you
Gord Brody: Im looking for a David Davidson.Woman: Im a woman.Gord Brody: Did I ask what sex you are?Woman: No.Gord Brody: Did I ask if you were David Davidson?Woman: My name is Cheryl.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 sex
Gord: Ahhh... Freddy. Freddy.Freddy Brody: Is that um...Jim: Thats your big brother. He couldnt handle the complexities of making a cheese sandwich so now hes back here at home with us... jeez, is that idiot still in the shower? Shit. How much water is he gonna use?Freddy Brody: How much is he gonna use? All of it? Save some for the fish or something. Right poP? Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 home
Jim: Miserable dead beat punk. Paid for his damn college. Sits around all day wacking off. Proud? My ASS.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 dead
Doctor: You did not save the day!
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 you
Psychiatrist: Mister Brody, this is very serious. Base on what I have heard today, I am required bylaw to notify the authorities.
— Freddy Got Fingered 2001 author

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