Internet

— Internet

[T]he index of a search engine can be thought of as analogous to the stars in [the] sky. What we see has never existed, as the light has traveled different distances to reach our eye. Similarly, Web pages referenced in an index were also explored at different dates and they may not exist any more.

— Internet travel

Twenty years ago no one could have imagined the effects the Internet would have: entire relationships flourish, friendships prosper…there’s a vast new intimacy and accidental poetry, not to mention the weirdest porn. The entire human experience seems to unveil itself like the surface of a new planet.

— Internet poetry

DHCP was invented by a rabid gerbil on speed.

— Internet

We have too many cellphones. We've got too many Internets. We have got to get rid of those machines. We have too many machines now.

— Internet man

I hear there's rumors on the internets that we're going to have a draft. We're not going to have a draft, period.

— Internet internet

The Internet is like a vault with a screen door on the back. I don't need jackhammers and atom bombs to get in when I can walk in through the door.

— Internet need

The Internet has made me very casual with a level of omniscience that was unthinkable a decade ago. I now wonder if God gets bored knowing the answer to everything.

— Internet science

Doing research on the Web is like using a library assembled piecemeal by pack rats and vandalized nightly.

— Internet sin

The NET is a waste of time, and that's exactly what's right about it.

— Internet time

During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet. I took the initiative in moving forward a whole range of initiatives that have proven to be important to our country's economic growth and environmental protection, improvements in our educational system.

— Internet education

In the next century, planet earth will don an electronic skin. It will use the Internet as a scaffold to support and transmit its sensations. This skin is already being stitched together. It consists of millions of embedded electronic measuring devices: thermostats, pressure gauges, pollution detectors, cameras, microphones, glucose sensors, EKGs, electroencephalographs. These will probe and monitor cities and endangered species, the atmosphere, our ships, highways and fleets of trucks, our conversations, our bodies--even our dreams."

— Internet dreams

That's the beauty of : You can roll around in a stranger's obsession without having to smell his or her house. You canwhenever you want without being rude. The site gets its "hit" and you know more about our species' diversity.

— Internet beauty

Most of us employ the Internet not to seek the best information, but rather to select information that confirms our prejudices.

— Internet prejudice

The real definition of Internet is: "lots of blogs and fat people trying to have sex with you."

— Internet people

For hundreds of millions of years, Sex was the most efficient method for propagating information of dubious provenance: the origins of all those snippets of junk DNA are lost in the sands of reproductive history. Move aside, Sex: the world-wide Web has usurped your role.

— Internet history

This is a little known fact technological about the Internet, but the Internet is actually made of words and enthusiasm.

— Internet words

It's strange — you know, the Net is denounced as austere, the product of the engineering mentality, so forth and so on. It's the most feminine influence that Western civilization has ever allowed itself to fall under the spell of. Theof the fourteenth century were as nothing compared to the boundary-dissolving, feminizing, permitting, nurturing nature of the Net. Maybe that's why there is an overwhelming male preference for it, in its early form, because that's where that was needed. But it is , it is wisdom, it is the penetrating archetypal femaleof the world-soul, leading us away from what was very sharp-edged and uncomfortable and repressive to our creativity and our sexuality and our relationships to each other and to the Earth.

— Internet wisdom

It's very sad how in theyou cannot get information into people's heads — as long as you write something on the internet and do not add— it is true : "I'm not sure he's a Christian." — I'm not sure he's a mammal, Jay. He could be a werewolf.

— Internet people

I have a theory that the Internet makes people stupider — and also FOX News makes people stupider. You know the Pew group did a study recently and they found out that 10 years ago, Democrats, Republicans and independents basically got their news from the same sources, probably more from CNN, for example. Then we had this polarity. … We do have two Americas. We have the America that's living in reality. The people who understand thatis a centrist liberal from Hawaii who is trying to dig us out of the hole we're in. And then we have this other FOX// reality where he is a Muslim sleeper cell, Manchurian candidate who was sent over by his Kenyan father…

— Internet people

I think that the online world has actually brought books back. People are reading because they're reading the damn screen. That's more reading than people used to do.

— Internet books

Even if you do go into a coma, you can still keep posting to Usenet -- everyone else does.

— Internet you

The Internet has come to resemble an enormous used book store with volumes stacked on shelves and tables and overflowing onto the floor, and a continuous stream of new books being added helter-skelter to the piles.

— Internet books

There is nothing that is truly free nor democratic enough. Make no mistake, the internet did not come to save the world.

— Internet world

They can't ignore us, and they can't put us down. Thank God for the Internet, or we wouldn't know anything, and we would already be a fascist state.

— Internet read

The members of thedid not live to see the full flowering of the scientific method, and we will not live to see what use humanity makes of a medium for sharing that is cheap, instant, and global (both in the sense of 'comes from everyone' and 'goes everywhere.') We are, however, the people who are setting the earliest patterns for this medium. Our fate won't matter much, but the norms we set will. Given what we have today, the Internet could easily become Invisible High School, with a modicum of educational material in an ocean of narcissism and social obsessions. We could, however, also use it as an Invisible College, the communicative backbone of real intellectual and civic change.

— Internet education

Some complain that e-mail is impersonal -- that your contact with me, during the e-mail phase of our relationship, was mediated by wires and screens and cables. Some would say that's not as good as conversing face-to-face. And yet our seeing of things is always mediated by corneas, retinas, optic nerves, and some neural machinery that takes the information from the optic nerve and propagates it into our minds. So, is looking at words on a screen so very much inferior? I think not; at least then you are conscious of the distortions. Whereas, when you see someone with your eyes, you forget about the distortions and imagine you are experiencing them purely and immediately.

— Internet words

The Internet is a hole you pour your friends into for a never-ending stream of kitten photos and porn. Of course, that's quite a bargain, for some of us.

— Internet friends

And again, the Internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a big truck. It's a .

— Internet you

On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog.

— Internet body

On the Internet, nobody can hear you fart.

— Internet art

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