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Kath & Kim

1 Series 11.1 Sex 1.1 1.2 Gay 1.2 1.3 Sport 1.3 1.4 Fat 1.4 1.5 Old 1.5 1.6 Money 1.6 1.7 Party 1.7 1.8 The Wedding 1.8
— Kath & Kim art
2 Series 22.1 The Announcement 2.1 2.2 Inside Out 2.2 2.3 The Moon 2.3 2.4 Obsession 2.4 2.5 My Boyfriend 2.5 2.6 Another Announcement 2.6 2.7 The Shower 2.7 2.8 The Hideous Truth 2.8
— Kath & Kim truth
3 Series 33.1 Cactus Hour 3.1 3.2 The Mango Espadrille 3.2 3.3 Sitting on a Pile 3.3 3.4 Kicking up a Stink 3.4 3.5 Hello Nails! 3.5 3.6 High and Dry 3.6 3.7 Foxy on the Run 3.7 3.8 99% Fat Free 3.8
— Kath & Kim man
Kim: You think Brett is the bees knees. Well let me tell you, mum, bees knees are hard to live with 24/7!
— Kath & Kim live
Kath: Oh Kim, Im very proud to say that last night Kel made me feel more like a woman than I have in a very long time.
— Kath & Kim time
Kath: Oh no Kim, I need to talk about it, you know last night Kel touched me, he touched me in nooks and in unexplored crannies I never knew I had.
— Kath & Kim night
Sharon: Kim, I think its nice about your mum and Kel. Dont you think its nice that shes got a boyfriend? Or are they day factos?
— Kath & Kim you
Kim: Day facto, night facto the fact that theyre facto-ing at all I find repulsive in the extreme.
— Kath & Kim night
Kath: Kim, Ill tell you something for nothing, you may eat like a pig, but youre certainly not a dog.
— Kath & Kim you
Kath: Really? Oh, what a nong I am to think that you were gay when youre a big Barbara Streisand fan.
— Kath & Kim you
Kath: The ozone diet. Its the only way! Its taking Hollywood by storm, Kim. Everybodys on it: Madonna Penn Ritchie, Jennifer Pitt Aniston, Courtney Loves Cox.
— Kath & Kim love
Kath: Well, its air evidently, Kimmy. You eat air for two weeks, and then red meat for two weeks, so it all balances out!
— Kath & Kim you
Kath: Look, I just feel I have so many options, R.E: the venue at the moment; you know Ive got Big Jugs on one hand, Ive got Dirty Nellys on the other, and now Ive got King Henry VIII constantly on my back!
— Kath & Kim men
Brett: Talking to Kim about online dating Why dont you try logging on to WWW dot bretty dot com - hey you, come here! grabs Kim
— Kath & Kim dating
Kath: I really want something elegant, you know. Something, I dont know, maybe a cocktail party. You know, with some hot suggestions.
— Kath & Kim art
Kim: Yeah, yeah, yeah! We can have those classy cocktails. Ive had them all, Sixtey-Niner, Slow Screw Against The Wall, Sex On The Beach.
— Kath & Kim sex
Prue: A plunger in your Bodums always nice. And it comes with these matching cups which are cyuuute.
— Kath & Kim you
Prue: How about Nigella Olivers newie? Its the box set! Its got New Food, Screwed Food, Rude Food and Nude Food
— Kath & Kim food
Prue: I was furious, Trude, because she knew we had the Stockbrokers-in-Crisis polo picnic, and we had to make thirty mini goats cheese pizzas!
— Kath & Kim
Trude: Why, Flicks like that; she doesnt think! I mean, she and Jeff are grayshsh, and i love seeing them at Noorrsa
— Kath & Kim love
Trude: Oh, that reminds me -- that little man from Beechtree and Sons is coming over to talk hoihurba.
— Kath & Kim mind
Prue: Oh God, I hope hes surba. Oh, weve got stacks of hoihurba left urva from Octurba! Sees Kath and Kim You all right there?
— Kath & Kim god
Kath: Eyes Wide Shut, that was a funny film! Actually I might get that out on DVDyeahget me out on myself
— Kath & Kim funny
Kath: Kimmie, look at me. Look at me please. Look at me, look at me. Now, I have one word for you: feng shui.
— Kath & Kim you
Kath: Youve got your back to the door. It means your enemies can come in at any time and clock you on the head!
— Kath & Kim time
Kath:Oh no, Kim, monogamys very old fashioned. You just want a veneer of monogamy. Thats all people care about these days.
— Kath & Kim people
Kim: What I think? Ill tell you what I think. I think you can stick the A.I.S right up your A.I.S.E.
— Kath & Kim you
Kim yoghurt dripping from her mouth down her top: Im corporate, I could entertain those dickheads anyday.
— Kath & Kim hurt
Kath: talking on the phone Oh yes hello Trish? Yes, yes its Kath Day Knight, Um look yeah my phone line is down, well theres something wrong with the phone and I need to be connacted by my local florist at present.
— Kath & Kim hell
Brett: Well, there it is. I know its the worst house, but its on the best street. Its what youre supposed to buy.
— Kath & Kim you
Kim: No, youve got it all wrong. Youre supposed to buy the best house on the worst street, cause then you can lord it over people.
— Kath & Kim people
Kim: Well, doesnt that just sum it up, Acting Assistant Deputy Sales Manager in Charge of Software. Wow, Im impressed not.
— Kath & Kim war
Kim: What about me? Im stuck at home with Epponnee on my face, mum on my back and Kel up my goat. How would you like it?
— Kath & Kim home
Kath: Oh, yes, Im reading that, but Im reading the abridged version. Its called the Eensie-Weensie Da Vinci Code.
— Kath & Kim reading
Kel: What is so wrong with two baby-boomers getting it on for a photo while were still both incredibly fit?
— Kath & Kim wit
Kel: Itll be good for us, and I can afford to lose a few kilos. We can see it as a bit of a challenge.
— Kath & Kim good
Kath: Yeah! Itll be something to do, wont it, doll? Oh goodie! I feel a bit energized by your near-death experience.
— Kath & Kim death
Kim: No, I think this time youre the one stacking on the kilos! I think for once, the mule is on the other foot.
— Kath & Kim time
Kath: Awww, little Epponnee-Rae, its alright darling, Epponnee Raelene Charlene Kathleen Darlene Craig. You are getting more and more like your boo-tiful granny as the days go by. Look at her hair, Kimmie, its getting a nice frizz to it!
— Kath & Kim you
Kim: Oh, dont wish that on her! Although, I do think, luckily, personality-wise shes going to be like me.
— Kath & Kim personality
Kim: Oh, its stupid, is it? So are the people on Big Brother stupid? Cause they all do pole dancing.
— Kath & Kim people
Kath: I wouldnt be playing the cold shoulder all too often with Brett, you know, Kim. The way hes presenting himself at the moment, hes a most irresistible package.
— Kath & Kim men
Kim: Mum, Brett is not having an affair. Why would he go for fillet steak when hes got sausage meat at home? Receives a text from Sharon telling her about Brett kissing Kelly Brett had fillet steak last night!
— Kath & Kim sin

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