lilo and stitch

Hula Teacher: Lilo, why are you all wet?Lilo: Its sandwich day. Every Thursday I take Pudge the fish a peanut butter sandwich...Hula Teacher: Pudge is a fish?Lilo: And today we were out of peanut butter. So I asked my sister what to give him, and she said a tuna sandwich. I cant give Pudge tuna![whispering]Lilo: Do you know what tuna *is*?Hula Teacher: Fish?Lilo: [hysterical] Its fish! If I give Pudge tuna, Id be an abomination! Im late because I had to go to the store and get peanut butter cause all we have is... is... stinkin tuna!Hula Teacher: Lilo, Lilo, why is this so important?Lilo: [calmly] Pudge controls the weather.

[Stitch is running away]Lilo: Ohana means family. Family means no one gets left behind. But if you want to leave, you can. Ill remember you though.[looking at her picture of her dead parents]Lilo: I remember everyone that leaves.

— lilo and stitch family

Grand Councilwoman: [the Grand Councilwoman is yelling at Jumba] YOU! Youre the cause of all this! If it hadnt been for your Experiment 626, none of this...Stitch: [interrupting] Stitch!Grand Councilwoman: What?Stitch: My name, Stitch.Grand Councilwoman: [Dismissive] Stitch then. If it wasnt for Stitch...[turns to look at Stitch, surprised]Stitch: Does Stitch have to go in the ship?Grand Councilwoman: Yes...Stitch: Can Stitch say goodbye?Grand Councilwoman: Yes.Stitch: Thank you.Grand Councilwoman: [to Nani and Lilo] Who are you?Stitch: This is my family. I found it, all on my own. Is little, and broken, but still good. Ya. Still good.

— lilo and stitch family

Lilo: Oh good! My dog found the chainsaw!

— lilo and stitch good

Lilo: You know, you wreck everything you touch. Why not try and make something for a change?[Stitch builds a city out of what he finds in Lilos room]Lilo: Wow. San Francisco.[Stitch begins to destroy the city like the monster in Earth vs. the Spider, picking up a toy car]Stitch: [as car passengers] Eeeeeek! Save me!Lilo: No more caffeine for you.

— lilo and stitch art

[Stitch and Jumba are tossing a jammed up gun back and forth]Stitch: Merry Christmas.Jumba: Its not Christmas.Stitch: Happy Channukah!Jumba: Its not Channukah![Pleakley scoops up Lilo and carries her away from the house]Lilo: Were leaving Stitch?Pleakley: Trust me, this is not gonna end well!Jumba: One potato!Stitch: Two potato!Jumba: Three potato!Stitch: Four!Jumba: Five potato!Stitch: Six potato!Jumba: Seven potato more!Stitch: My...Jumba: mother...Stitch: told...Jumba: me...Stitch: you...Jumba: are...Stitch: ...it.Jumba: Ha! I win![gun explodes in his hands]

— lilo and stitch trust

Lilo: Did you lose your job because of Stitch and me?Nani: Nah. The managers a vampire. He wanted me to join his legion of the undead.Lilo: I knew it!

— lilo and stitch man

Lilo: Im sorry I bit you... and pulled your hair... and punched you in the face...

— lilo and stitch you

Grand Councilwoman: Experiment 626. Give us a sign you understand any of this. Show us that there is something inside you that is good.[Stitch clears his throat; the council members listen in anticipation]Stitch: Meega, nala kwishta![the entire council gasps in horror]Grand Councilwoman: [horrified] So... naughty![Stitch laughs maniacally]Jumba: I didnt teach him that!

— lilo and stitch men

Lilo: [Sitting at a table with Stitch] David! I got a new dog!David: Auwe... You sure its a dog?Lilo: Uh huh... He used to be a collie before he got ran over.

— lilo and stitch you

Nani: Oh, you are such a pain.Lilo: Then why dont you sell me and buy a rabbit instead?[she starts to walk up the stairs going up to her room]Nani: At least a rabbit would behave better than you!Lilo: Good! Then youll be happy cause itll be smarter than me, too!Nani: And quieter!Lilo: Youll like it cause its stinky like YOU![Lilo slams her bedroom door]Nani: [screaming] Go to your ROOOOOOOOMMM!Lilo: Im already in my room![Slams the door, Nani grabs a pillow and screams into it, in her room, Lilo screams into her own pillow, then flops down onto the bed]

— lilo and stitch art

Jumba: Come on, whats the big deal?Stitch: [in alien language] Oongatish mista!Jumba: Ill put you back together again... Ill make you taller, and not so fluffy![whips plates at Stitch, frisbee style]Stitch: I like fluffy![after there is a ring of holes around Stitch]Stitch: [in alien language] Ah, Pooama Chicky!Jumba: Ach! Leave my mother out of this!

— lilo and stitch language

Lilo: [Nani is taking Stitch outside] He was an orphan and we adopted him! What about ohana?Nani: He hasnt been here that long!Lilo: Neither have I. Dad said ohana means family.[Nani stops]Lilo: Ohana means family. Family means...Lilo, Nani: ...nobody gets left behind.Lilo: Or...?Nani: ...or forgotten. I know, I know. I hate it when you use ohana against me.

— lilo and stitch family

Lilo: A falling star... I call it! Get out, get out! I have to make a wish![Pushes Nani out of her room]Lilo: Cant you go any faster?Nani: Oh no! Gravity is increasing on me![Nani begins to fall on Lilo]Lilo: No, its not!Nani: Is too, Lilo, the same thing happened yesterday!Lilo: You rotten sister, your butt is crushing me! Why do you act so weird?

— lilo and stitch sin

Nani: You are so finished when I get in there! Im gonna stuff you in the blender, push puree, then bake you into a pie and feed it to the social worker! And when he says, Mmmm, this is great, whats your secret? Im gonna say...[Mr. Bubbles hooks his foot around hers and pulls her away from the dog-door]Nani: ...Love... and... nurturing...

— lilo and stitch love

Stitch: [looking at Lilos storybook. the picture says Im lost!] L-lo-lost... Im lost.

— lilo and stitch book

Pleakley: [Nani sees Pleakley and Jumba arrest Stitch] Dont interact with her.[They turn their backs on Nani]Nani: Wheres Lilo?Jumba: Who?[Pleakley hits Jumba]Jumba: What?Nani: Lilo. My sister.Jumba: Uh... sorry, we do not know anyone by this, uh...Nani: Lilo! Shes a little girl this big, she has black hair and brown eyes and she hangs around with that THING!Jumba: [sighs] We know her.Nani: Bring... her... back.Pleakley: Oh, we cant do that. Uh-uh. That would be misuse of galactic resources.Jumba: See, problem is, were just here for him.Nani: So shes gone?Pleakley: Look at the bright side. You wont have to yell at anyone anymore.

— lilo and stitch you

Jumba: Yes, yes, thats it, come quietly.Stitch: W-... waiting.Jumba: For what?Stitch: Family.Jumba: Ah. You dont have one. I made you.Stitch: Maybe... I could...Jumba: You are built to destroy. You can never belong.

— lilo and stitch family

Lilo: Hey! Three days ago, I bought Stitch at the shelter. I paid two dollars for him. See this stamp? I own him. If you take him, youre stealing.Mr. Cobra Bubbles: Aliens are all about rules.Grand Councilwoman: You look familiar.Mr. Cobra Bubbles: CIA. Roswell. 1973.Grand Councilwoman: Ah, yes. You had hair then.

— lilo and stitch man

Lilo: Were a broken family, arent we?Nani: No... Maybe, a little. Maybe a lot. I shouldnt have yelled at you.Lilo: Were sisters. Its our job.Nani: Yeah, well, from now on...Lilo: I like you better as a sister than a mom.Nani: Yeah?Lilo: [on the verge of tears ] And you like me better as a sister than a rabbit, right?

— lilo and stitch family

Lilo: Dont worry. She likes your butt and fancy hair. I know. I read her diary.David: She thinks its fancy?

— lilo and stitch you

[first lines]Grand Councilwoman: Read the charges.Gantu: Doctor Jumba Jookiba, you stand before this council accused of illegal genetic experimentation!Grand Councilwoman: How do you plead?Jumba: Not guilty! My experiments are only theoretical, and completely within legal boundaries.Grand Councilwoman: We believe you actually... created something.Jumba: Created something? Hah! But that would be irresponsible and unethical. I would never, ever...[Stitch is revealed]Jumba: ...make... more than one.

— lilo and stitch men

Grand Councilwoman: Can we not simply destroy the island?Pleakley: NO, crazyhead! The mosquitos food of choice, primitive humanoid lifeforms, have colonies all over that planet.Grand Councilwoman: Are they intelligent?Pleakley: No. But theyre very delicate. In fact, every time an asteroid strikes their planet, they have to begin life all over. Fascinating, isnt it?

— lilo and stitch life

Lilo: You came back.Stitch: Nobody gets left behind.

— lilo and stitch body

Nani: We need something that can defend itself. Something that wont die. Something... sturdy... you know?Lilo: Like a lobster!Nani: Lilo, Lilolo! Do we have a lobster door? No! We have a dog door! We are getting a dog!

— lilo and stitch self

Jumba: 626 was designed to be a monster, but now he has nothing to destroy. You see, I never gave him a greater purpose. What must it be like to have nothing, not even memories to look back on in the middle of the night?

— lilo and stitch purpose

Lilo: [praying] Its me again. I need someone to be my friend. Someone who wont run away. Maybe send me an angel! The nicest angel you have.

— lilo and stitch you

Lilo: [explaining the death of her parents to Stitch] It was raining, and they went for a drive. What happened to yours? I hear you cry at night. Do you dream about them? I know thats why you wreck things, and push me.

— lilo and stitch death

Captain Gantu: Abomination!Stitch: Stupid-head!

— lilo and stitch

Lilo: Our familys little now, and we dont have many toys... But if you want, you could be a part of it. You could be our baby, and wed raise you to be good.

— lilo and stitch art

Lilo: [Stitch is tearing one of her paintings] No, thats from my blue period!

— lilo and stitch pain

Lilo: Hello? Are there any animals in here?[Stitch appears]Lilo: Hi!Stitch: H... h... hi![Hugs her]Lilo: Wow!

— lilo and stitch animals

Pleakley: Oh great! Hes loose!Jumba: His destructive programming is taking effect. He will be irresistibly drawn to large cities, where he will back up sewers, reverse street signs, and steal everyones left shoe.

— lilo and stitch will

Pleakley: Help! I dont like the ocean! Ahh! Oh, look, a friendly little dolphin. They helped sailors during the war... Its a shark! Its a shark and it aint friendly! Looks like a dolphin... Tricky fish! Tricky fish! Octopus, will you please help me? An octo... the octopus is worse than the shark! I hate this planet!

— lilo and stitch war

Lilo: This is your badness level. Its unusually high for someone your size. We have to fix that.

— lilo and stitch you

Lilo: Dont leave me, okay?Stitch: Okay.

— lilo and stitch

Jumba: WHAT? After all you put me through, you expect me to help you just like that? JUST LIKE THAT?Stitch: [alien language] Ih.Jumba: Fine!Pleakley: Fine? Youre doing what he says?Jumba: Hes very persuasive!

— lilo and stitch language

Nani: Did you catch fire again?David: No, just the stage.

— lilo and stitch age

David: [to Stitch] So youre from outer space? I hear the surfing is choice.

— lilo and stitch choice

Nani: CIA?Mr. Cobra Bubbles: Former. Saved the planet once. Convinced an alien race mosquitoes were an endangered species.

— lilo and stitch anger

Nani: Why didnt you wait at school? You were supposed to wait *there*! Lilo! Do you not understand? Do you *want* to be taken away? Answer me!Lilo: No!Nani: No, you dont understand?Lilo: No!Nani: No, what?Lilo: Noooo![slumps down on the floor]

— lilo and stitch school

Gantu: [as the ship jolts] What was that?Second Alien: I... dont think hes on the ship anymore...Alien: Confirmed! Hes taken a police cruiser.Second Alien: Yeah... he took the red one.

— lilo and stitch think

Pleakley: Look! A mosquito has chosen me as her perch. Shes so beautiful. Look, another one! And another one! Why, its a whole flock! They like me! Theyre nuzzling my flesh with their noses! Now theyre... theyre... Aaaaaaaah!

— lilo and stitch beautiful

Jumba: [sees Pleakley trying on a wig] What are you doing?Pleakley: [hiding wig] Nothing.Jumba: Say, I want to try it on.Pleakley: No.Jumba: Share![wrestles wig from Pleakley]Pleakley: Hey! Ow! Youre just jealous cause Im pretty!

— lilo and stitch you

Nani: Ill tell you what. If you promise not to fight anymore, I promise not to yell at you, except on special occasions.Lilo: Tuesdays and bank holidays would be good.

— lilo and stitch good

Grand Councilwoman: Take note of this. This creature is hereby sentenced to life in exile, a sentence that shall be henceforth served out here, on Earth. And as caretaker of the alien lifeform Stitch, this family is hereby under the protection of the United Intergalactic Federation. Well be checking in now and then.Mr. Cobra Bubbles: I was afraid you were going to say that. This wont be easy to explain back at headquarters.Grand Councilwoman: I know what you mean.

— lilo and stitch life

Stitch: [while using a VW Beetle to defend himself against attackers] Blue punch buggy... no punch-back!

— lilo and stitch self

Lilo: [creating voodoo dolls of her playmates] My friends need to be punished.

— lilo and stitch friends

Mr. Cobra Bubbles: Heard you lost your job.Nani: Well... I just quit that job, because the hours are just not conducive to raising a child...[Stitch hits Cobra in the face with a ball]Nani: Hey!Mr. Cobra Bubbles: What is that?Lilo: Thats my puppy.Mr. Cobra Bubbles: Really?[Adjusts neck]Mr. Cobra Bubbles: Thus far you have been adrift in the sheltered harbor of my patience, but I cannot tolerate you being jobless. Do I make myself clear?Nani: Perfectly.Mr. Cobra Bubbles: And next time I see that dog, I want him to be a model citizen. Capisce?Lilo: Uh... yes?Mr. Cobra Bubbles: New job. Model citizen.[Puts on sunglasses; one of the lenses pops off]Mr. Cobra Bubbles: Good day.

— lilo and stitch time

Nani: Okay, talk. I know you had something to do with this. Now, wheres Lilo? Talk! I know you can.Stitch: [reveals his alien form] Okay, okay.[Nani freaks and smacks him down with a tree branch]

— lilo and stitch you

Pleakley: Stop! I have just determined the situation to be far too hazardous!Jumba: Dont worry. I wont hit her.Pleakley: No! That girl is part of the mosquito food chain.[Gives Jumba his View Master]Pleakley: Here, educate yourself.Jumba: Using that little girl for a shield.[At Stitch]Jumba: This is low even for you!

— lilo and stitch art

Pleakley: [after Stitch chews on his head] All is well! Please go about your business! Im okay!Nani: Uh, your head looks... swollen.Jumba: Actually, shes just ugly.Pleakley: [laughing nervously] Oh, hes joking. Ugly - Look at me!

— lilo and stitch business

Grand Councilwoman: A quiet capture would require an understanding of 626 that we do not possess! Who then, Mr. Pleakley, would *you* send for his extraction?Pleakley: [thinks for a moment] Does he have a brother?[Councilwoman rolls her eyes]Pleakley: Close relative, perhaps?[Later, in the prison where Jumba is kept]Pleakley: [nervously] Friendly cousin? Neighbor with a beard?

— lilo and stitch men

Jumba: [has Stitch on his sights] You are all mine.Pleakley: Well, what is he doing?Jumba: Quiet! Hes listening for us.Pleakley: [whispering] How good is his hearing?[Stitch immediately turns around]

— lilo and stitch good

Pleakley: Oh, good! I was hoping to add theft, endangerment, and INSANITY to my list of things I did today!Jumba: Ha ha! You too?

— lilo and stitch men

Lilo: Leave me alone to diiiiie.

— lilo and stitch alone

Lilo: Its nice to live on an island with no large cities.[Stitch throws a convulsive fit]Lilo: Are you okay?

— lilo and stitch live

Nani: [talking on the phone] I think it might be a koala... an *evil* koala. I cant even pet it! It keeps *staring* at me, like its gonna eat me!

— lilo and stitch evil

Rescue Lady: Oh yes, mm-hmm, all of our dogs are adoptable.[Lilo walks in with Stitch]Rescue Lady: Except that one!Nani: What is that thing?Rescue Lady: A dog, I think... But it was dead this morning!Nani: It was dead this morning?Rescue Lady: Well we thought it was dead, it was hit by a truck!

— lilo and stitch thought

Lilo: Elvis Presley was a model citizen. Ive compiled a list of his traits for you to practice. Number one... is dancing!

— lilo and stitch you

Rescue lady: You have to think of a name for him.Lilo: His name is... Stitch.Rescue lady: But thats not a real name...[Nani gesturing NO]Rescue lady: in... Iceland. But here its a good name! Stitch it is.

— lilo and stitch good

Gantu: What is that monstrosity?Jumba: Monstrosity? What you see before you is the first of a new species. I call it Experiment 626. He is fire-proof, bullet-proof, and can think faster than super computer. He can see in the dark, and lift objects three thousand times his size. His only instinct... to destroy everything he touches! Ha ha ha ha!Grand Councilwoman: So it IS a monster.Jumba: Eh, just a little one.

— lilo and stitch time

Captain Gantu: Place that idiot scientist under arrest.Jumba: I prefer to be called Evil Genius.

— lilo and stitch evil

Pleakley: Oh, cant complain, Mom. Camping out with a convicted criminal. And, uh... oh, I had my head chewed on by a monster!

— lilo and stitch wit

[meeting the social worker after damaging his car]Nani: Hi... uh... you must be, the, uh...Mr. Cobra Bubbles: The stupidhead.Nani: Oh. Ohhhh! Oh, you know, Im *really* sorry about that, and if I had known who you were, of course I never wouldve... I can pay for that.Mr. Cobra Bubbles: Its a rental. Are you the guardian in question?Nani: Yes. Im Nani, nice to meet you Mr...Mr. Cobra Bubbles: Bubbles.Nani: Mr. Bubbles? Thats a strange...Mr. Cobra Bubbles: Yes, I know. Are you going to invite me in, Nani?

— lilo and stitch work

David: I may not be a doctor, but I know theres no better cure for a sour face than a couple of boards and some choice waves. Whatcha think?

— lilo and stitch choice

Lilo: Stitch is troubled. He needs desserts!

— lilo and stitch need

Jumba: So, tell me, my little one-eyed one... on what poor, pitiful, defenseless planet has my monstrosity been unleashed?

— lilo and stitch poor

[after being bitten by Stitch]Captain Gantu: Uh... Does this look infected to you?

— lilo and stitch you

Myrtle Edmonds: [regarding the bite mark Lilo gave her] Does this look infected to you?Lilo: Yeah!Myrtle Edmonds: Youd better not have rabies.Girl: If you have rabies, the doctors are gonna have to cut...Lilo: Are you playing dolls?[the others hide their dolls]Myrtle Edmonds: You dont have a doll.Lilo: [pulls a strange looking rag doll from her backpack] This is Scrump.[other girls gasp in horror]Lilo: I made her. But her head is too big, so I pretended that a bug laid eggs in her ear, and shes upset because she has only a few more days to...[notices that all the other girls are gone; She throws Scrump on the floor and walks away, then returns for Scrump]

— lilo and stitch horror

Nani: You smell like a lawn mower.

— lilo and stitch law

Jumba: Dont worry, is all part of plan. We are professionals. Hey! Get that out of your mouth!

— lilo and stitch art

Lilo: [as Cobra holds her, she explains the explosion] One of them had a giant eye in the middle of his face.Nani: [runs to take Lilo] Oh, Lilo.[Cobra places Lilo in the car and closes the door]Nani: Please dont do this.Mr. Cobra Bubbles: You know I have no choice.Nani: No! Youre not taking her! Im the only one who understands her! You take that away, she wont stand a chance!Mr. Cobra Bubbles: Youre making this harder than it needs to be.Nani: But you dont know what youre doing! She needs me!Mr. Cobra Bubbles: [points to the exploded house] IS THIS WHAT SHE NEEDS? It seems clear to me that you need her a lot more than she needs you.

— lilo and stitch choice

Jumba: Hiding behind your little friend wont work anymore. Didnt I tell you? We got fired this morning. New rules.

— lilo and stitch work

Jumba: [captures Stitch] Aha! Now, all your washing is up!Pleakley: Youre under arrest. Read him his rights.Jumba: Listen carefully.[slams Stitchs head repeatedly against a palm tree]

— lilo and stitch you

Pleakley: Hold it! Hold everything! Earth is a protected wildlife preserve. Yeah, weve been using it to rebuild the mosquito population, which need I remind you, is an endangered species.

— lilo and stitch life

Jumba: Were fired. Now we do it *my* way!

— lilo and stitch fire

Jumba: Heh heh, he got away?Grand Councilwoman: Im sure this comes as no surprise to you.Jumba: I designed 626 to be unstoppable.Grand Councilwoman: Which is precisely why you must now bring him back.Jumba: What? Me?Grand Councilwoman: And to reward you, we are willing to trade your freedom for his capture.

— lilo and stitch war

Lilo: [to Nani] Youre loose in the house all the time and I sleep just fine!

— lilo and stitch time

Lilo: I got a new dog. His name is Stitch.Myrtle Edmonds: That is the ugliest thing I have ever saw!other girls: Yeeaahh!

— lilo and stitch lies

Pleakley: [hands Jumba a Viewmaster] Here! Educate yourself!

— lilo and stitch self

Pleakley: [while being jerked up and down by a running Jumba] We! Can not! Be Seen!

— lilo and stitch running

Stitch: Poocha Chubugga Oom Chickee! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

— lilo and stitch

Stitch: Aloha!

— lilo and stitch

Grand Councilwoman: What about military forces just landing there?Pleakley: Well that would be a BAD IDEA! These are extremely simple creatures, miss. Landing there would create mass mayhem and planet-wide panic!

— lilo and stitch man

[after they wipe out while surfing]Lilo: What happened?Nani: Some lolo must have stuffed us in the barrel.

— lilo and stitch

Grand Councilwoman: And as for that abomination, it is the flawed product of a deranged mind. It has no place among us. Captain Gantu, take him away.Gantu: With pleasure.

— lilo and stitch mind

Captain Gantu: Uncomfortable? Aw. Good! The council has sentenced you to exile on a desert asteroid. So relax, enjoy the trip... and dont get any ideas. These guns are locked onto your genetic signature. They wont shoot anyone but you.

— lilo and stitch nature

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