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Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh

The man who invented the red carpet needed his head examined.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh man
You have mosquitoes. I have the Press.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh you
British women can't cook.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh women
It seems to me that it's the best way of wasting money that I know of. I don't think investments on the moon pay a very high dividend.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh money
Everybody was saying we must have more leisure. Now they are complaining they are unemployed.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh body
If it has four legs and is not a chair, has wings and is not an aeroplane, or swims and is not a submarine, thewill eat it.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh will
If you stay here much longer, you'll all be slitty-eyed.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh you
I just wonder what it would be like to be reincarnated in an animal whose species had been so reduced in numbers than it was in danger of extinction. What would be its feelings toward the human species whose population explosion had denied it somewhere to exist... I must confess that I am tempted to ask for reincarnation as a particularly deadly virus.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh war
You can't have been here that long — you haven't got a pot belly.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh you
Aren't most of you descended from pirates?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh you
Deaf? If you are near there, no wonder you are deaf.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh wonder
A gun is no more dangerous than a cricket bat in the hands of a madman.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh man
People usually say that after a fire it is water damage that is the worst. We are still trying to dry out .
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh age
You are a woman, aren't you?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh man
How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to get them through the test?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh you
You managed not to get eaten then?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh man
Do you still throw spears at each other?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh you
Do you know they're now producing eating dogs for the anorexics?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh dogs
Ah good, there's so many over there you feel they breed them just to put in orphanages.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh man
How can you tell the difference between them?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh you
Well, you'll never fly in it, you're too fat to be an astronaut.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh you
It looks as if it was put in by an Indian.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh india
There's a lot of your family in tonight.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh family
"Are you all one family?"
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh family
"Oh, what, a strip club?"
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh
Constitutionally I don't exist.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh
There is nothing like it for morale to be reminded that the years are passing - ever more quickly - and that bits are dropping off the ancient frame. But it is nice to be remembered at all.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh mind
Is it made with Liffey water?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh water
Have you run over anybody?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh body
For conservation to be successful it is necessary to take into consideration that it is a characteristic of man that he can only be relied upon to do anything consistently which is in his own interest. He may have occasional fits of conscience and moral rectitude but otherwise his actions are governed by self-interest. It follows then that whatever the moral reasons for conservation it will only be achieved by the inducement of profit or pleasure.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh success
If we are to exercise our responsibilities so that all life can continue on earth, they must have a moral and philosophical basis. Simple self-interest, economic profit and absolute materialism are no longer enough... It has been made perfectly clear that a concern for any part of life on this planet — human, plant or animal, wild or tame — is a concern for all life. A threat to any part of the environment is a threat to the whole environment, but we must have a basis of assessment of these threats, not so that we can establish a priority of fears, but so that we can make a positive contribution to improvement and ultimate survival.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh life
It is frequently more rewarding merely to ask pertinent questions. It may get someone to go and look for an answer. If you get a silly answer, which can easily happen, you can return to the charge with even more telling effect. Whatever happens, don't give up and don't despair. Results may not be immediately apparent, but you may have touched a receptive chord without knowing it. Even the most unsympathetic and unenlightened politician, industrialist or bureaucrat begins to take notice when a lot of people write about the same subject.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh war
It is an old cliche to say that the future is in the hands of the young. This is no longer true. The quality of life to be enjoyed or the existence to be survived by our children and future generations is in our hands now.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh life

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