I am a ridiculous person. Now they call me a madman. That would be a promotion if it were not that I remain as ridiculous in theiras before. But now I do not resent it, they are all dear to me now, even when theyat me — and, indeed, it is just then that they are particularly dear to me. I could join in their laughter — not exactly at myself, but through affection for them, if I did not feel so sad as I look at them. Sad because they do not know theand I do know it. Oh, how hard it is to be the only one who knows the truth! But they won'tthat. No, they won't understand it.

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