Wild Hogs 2007

Dudley Frank: The music moves me, but it moves me ugly.

— Wild Hogs 2007 music

Jack: Youre gonna pay a disobedience fee of $10,000! Plus another $40,000 to rebuild the bar! And if you wanna see your friend alive again, do not call the cops! If youre not here in half an hour to settle this, Im gonna take the fine out on your friends legs! Im gonna break em with this tire iron!Dudley Frank: Dont bring the money! Im a computer programmer! I dont need my legs!Jack: Fine! Ill break his hands!Dudley Frank: Oh, damn it. Bring the money!

— Wild Hogs 2007 money

Highway Patrolman: 4 counts of indecent exposure... 2 counts of lewd, lascivious behavior, and one count - pure jealousyDoug Madsen: [shocked] Huh?Highway Patrolman: [Smiling] How you doing?

— Wild Hogs 2007 man

Doug Madsen: Ooh boy, my ass is sore.Dudley Frank: Mine too, its Woodys fault for riding us so hard yesterday. The human body wasnt made to stradle something that big for that long.Woody Stevens: Well ya know its gonna hurt a little bit but thats all part of the experience. Its why we didnt bring our wives.Bobby Davis: Wut da...? What the hell? Someone wanna explain to me why Im the one in the dirt? When I got sore jaws from 3 hours of blowin...[notices Highway Patrolman]Bobby Davis: .Highway Patrolman: Please... Please, for the love of God, finish your sentence.

— Wild Hogs 2007 love

Bobby Davis: [after being called out by Jack] Anyone else getting that pre-rape feeling?Red: [grinning] I do.

— Wild Hogs 2007 feeling

Maggie: Thats too bad. I wanted you to try my chili. Its pretty hot.Dudley Frank: No, Ill try it. I like your kind of hot. Chili, chili hot. Food hot. Thats the hot I want to kiss. Eat.

— Wild Hogs 2007 food

Dudley Frank: [after tasting some of Maggis chili] Mother of God! I swallowed hot lava!

— Wild Hogs 2007 god

Dudley Frank: [upon seeing Maggie] She is perfect.Doug Madsen: You like the waitress?Dudley Frank: Oh, man. I wanted to say something funny to her, but all I could think of was black jokes.Bobby Davis: Like which ones?Dudley Frank: I forget.Bobby Davis: Why dont you tell the one that ends with you getting your ass whooped.Dudley Frank: Would that be funny?Bobby Davis: Ill be laughing. Oh, Ill be cracking up.

— Wild Hogs 2007 funny

[first lines]Dudley Frank: [after getting a fist-tap from Woody and nearly wiping out] Whoa! Whoa! Oh! Man, oh, man. I almost lost it back there. I didnt know what was going on.[hits a sign face first]

— Wild Hogs 2007 man

Red: When we drink piss, we drink it cold!Murdock: What?Red: We dont drink piss!

— Wild Hogs 2007

Doug Madsen: Well, what has your wife ever made us?Bobby Davis: Hard.

— Wild Hogs 2007 you

Dudley Frank: Thanks, Woody, I feel really safe with you.Woody Stevens: I noticed that. If you ever lay your head on my back while riding bitch, Ill throw you into traffic!Dudley Frank: I was just trying to keep the wind out of my face.Woody Stevens: I felt you smell my neck!Bobby Davis: Did you smell that mans neck?Dudley Frank: His cologne is fantastic. Its musky with an oaky finish like a... lawyer cowboy.Bobby Davis: A lawyer cowboy?

— Wild Hogs 2007 man

Damien Blade: [Damien walks up to the Wild Hogs after the Del Fuegos leave] The posers. What do you guys call yourselves?Woody Stevens: Im Woody...[the others say their names]Damien Blade: [interrupting] No, no... you all riding together? What do you call yourselves?Dudley Frank: Hogs... Wild Hogs.[turns around and shows Damien the back of his jacket]Damien Blade: [laughs] Wild Hogs. Well, Wild Hogs... ride hard or stay home. Oh, and guys... lose the watches.[he leaves]

— Wild Hogs 2007 home

Doug Madsen: You screwed up their lives? And by doing that, you decided to screw up our lives? Asshole!

— Wild Hogs 2007 live

Doug Madsen: Youre the sheriff, arent you going out there?Charley: Hey, I took my law enforcement course on the internet! For arms training they just told us to play Doom!

— Wild Hogs 2007 men

Woody Stevens: [a large yard is full of a bunch of leaves] Well go home, Toby! You make me sick!Toby: I cant do this many leaves for $10![Woody kicks a pile of leaves]

— Wild Hogs 2007 man

Dudley Frank: Im looking foward to the parade this year. I got little Tootsie Rolls to throw to the kids.Woody Stevens: Tootsie Rolls? You cannot even put on your left blinker without wiping out.

— Wild Hogs 2007 war

Dudley Frank: And I got a girlfriend. Punch that out of me, bitches.[gets knocked out]

— Wild Hogs 2007 friend

Charley: Needless to say, we dont carry firearms anymore. Sometimes you pull them out and think theyre not loaded, and...Bobby Davis: You blow your deputys ear off.Charley: Yeah.

— Wild Hogs 2007 time

Woody Stevens: Come on, guys, were exhausted. I think we should take the bikes back to the hotel, put them in a shed with the doors closed, and then play Scrabble in the room with the shades down.Doug Madsen: Look Aunt Bea, maybe you want to do something else here in Mayberry!

— Wild Hogs 2007 you

Doug Madsen: Woody, sorry I said you had ego issues.Woody Stevens: Sorry I said you were a pussy.Doug Madsen: You didnt call me a pussy.Woody Stevens: Well, not to your face, but thats what I was thinking.

— Wild Hogs 2007 thinking

Doug Madsen: Did he just say cracker?Dudley Frank: Cracker-ass.Doug Madsen: Oh, perfect.

— Wild Hogs 2007 perfect

Woody Stevens: Thats not a discussion.Dudley Frank: Yeah, thats a lawsuit.

— Wild Hogs 2007 law

Woody Stevens: Del Fuegos! Hide the bikes! Quick!

— Wild Hogs 2007 ego

Dudley Frank: Whatd you do, Woody?Woody Stevens: I cut the gas lines of their bikes, and then I maybe blew up their bar.

— Wild Hogs 2007 you

Doug Madsen: Youre the sheriff, why dont you go out there?Charley: Im the sheriff of a town of 500 people. I got my qualification from a course on the internet. For my arms training, they just told me to play Doom!

— Wild Hogs 2007 people

Charley: Man, that was like Level 12 of Doom.

— Wild Hogs 2007 man

Maggie: You coming back through?Dudley Frank: Maybe. A biker never knows. A week, a month.[pauses]Dudley Frank: Six days, ten hours, 27 minutes, give or take six minutes for wind resistance.

— Wild Hogs 2007 you

Dudley Frank: Its ok. I just hit my face!

— Wild Hogs 2007

Mother-in-Law: In my day, the women stayed home. Not the lazy men.Bobby Davis: In your day, men were busy building pyramids! How long ago was that?

— Wild Hogs 2007 women

Woody Stevens: Dudley, you have to get rid of that or else Im going to vomit in your lap.Dudley Frank: Fine, Ill hang it from a tree.Woody Stevens: Dont hang it in a tree.Dudley Frank: Why?Woody Stevens: Cause bears dont eat shit!

— Wild Hogs 2007 you

Highway Patrolman: [the tourist family flees after discovering the guys are skinny-dipping] Forget about them, more fun for us! Like what you see, huh? Lets get involved!

— Wild Hogs 2007 family

Jack: I knew you assholes the minute I laid eyes on you! Look at the four of you!Doug Madsen: You dont know us.Jack: [to Doug] You think I dont know you? Youre probably a... podiatrist or an ear-, nose-, and throat-specialist.Doug Madsen: I wish.Jack: An orthadontist?Bobby Davis: Close enough.Jack: [turns to Bobby] Bobby, guarantee youre hen-pecked! The wife wears the pants!Bobby Davis: You know my wife?Jack: [to Dudley] And you, no luck with women. I guarantee you bag your own shit.Dudley Frank: Wow, youre good. What color am I thinking of?Jack: Shut up![turns to Woody]Jack: And you, youre the biggest poser of them all... arent ya, Squinty! Go home!

— Wild Hogs 2007 women

Jack: Those assholes got balls.Red: That im gonna put them in my mouth and chew on!Jack: Youre gonna put what in your mouth?

— Wild Hogs 2007 you

Dudley Frank: Im okay, I just hurt my face.

— Wild Hogs 2007 hurt

Woody Stevens: Holy crap! Its the Golden Knight!

— Wild Hogs 2007 night

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