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South Park TV Series 1997–

Mr. Slave: Kids, lets keep it down for study group, or else Mr. Garrison is going to punish me.
— South Park TV Series 1997– kids
Butters: This is just like Vietnam, huh fellas? Whoopee!
— South Park TV Series 1997–
Cartman: Im not fat, Im big-boned.Stan: No, Jay Lenos chin is big-boned. You are a big fat ass.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Kyle: Were guys, dude. We find something about all our friends to rip on. We made fun of you for being rich for the same reason we rip on Butters for being wimpy.Stan: And we rip on Kyle for being a Jew.Kyle: And Stan for being in love with Wendy. And Cartman for being fat. And Cartman for being stupid. And Cartman for having a whore for a mom. And Cartman for being a sadistic asshole.Cartman: Hey. You did me already.
— South Park TV Series 1997– love
Tweek: But what if Im trying to put on the nose, the snowman comes alive and tries to kill me?Stan: Tweek, when has that ever happened, except for that one time?
— South Park TV Series 1997– time
Stan: [with a sigh, calmly] Oh, my God, we killed Kenny.Kyle: [shouts] We killed Kenny?Stan: Yup. Were bastards.
— South Park TV Series 1997– god
Stan: Were not getting on, you fat ugly bitch.Mrs. Crabtree: [shouting] What did you say?Stan: I said, Were not getting on, you fat ugly bitch.Mrs. Crabtree: Oh.Kyle: Whoa, dude.Stan: I always wondered if that would work.
— South Park TV Series 1997– work
Eric Cartman: Im not fat, I just havent grown into my body yet you skinny bitch.Mr. Garrison: Eric. If you call Wendy a bitch one more time Im sending you to the principals office.[beat]Eric Cartman: Bitch.Mr. Garrison: Thats it Eric, you...Eric Cartman: Im going.
— South Park TV Series 1997– time
Man #1: [after a crowd tramples Kenny] Oh my God, I found a penny.Man #2: You bastard.
— South Park TV Series 1997– god
Kenny: Mmmmf mmmf mmmmmf mmmmmmm mmmmf mmmmf mmmmmmmmf mmmf.Stan: Totally, dude.Kyle: Good point, man.
— South Park TV Series 1997– man
Eric Cartman: Oh, the tears of unfathomable sadness! Yummy!
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Cartman: Why dont we all sing, Kyles Mom is a Stupid Bitch in D-minor?
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Stan: Oh my god. Jay Lenos chin killed Kenny.Kyle: You bastard.Jay Leno: Ah, who cares? He dies every episode.
— South Park TV Series 1997– god
Satan: Saddam. But... I killed you.Saddam Hussein: Well where was I supposed to go, Detroit?
— South Park TV Series 1997– sad
Timmy: TIMAH.
— South Park TV Series 1997–
Cartman: Kennys family is so poor, they had to put their cardboard box up for a second mortgage.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Cartman: Im not fat, Im festively plump.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Priest Maxi: Boys, I havent seen you in church lately.Kyle: Well, Im Jewish.Priest Maxi: Youre not too Jewish to worship Jesus, are you?Kyle: I guess not.
— South Park TV Series 1997– jesus
Stan: Jimmy, will you go talk to Wendy for me?Jimmy: F-F-for wh-what?Stan: Just go talk to her, and be poetic. Tell her shes my muse. No, tell her... tell her... shes a continuing source of inspiration to me.Jimmy: Shes what?Stan: Shes a continuing source of inspiration to me.Jimmy: Okay. Hey, W- Hey, Wendy.Wendy: Yeah?Jimmy: Stan says youre a cont... youre a cont... Stan says youre a cont- cont...[sounds like cunt]Wendy: Well, tell Stan to stop![walks away]Jimmy: [continues] ... cont... Youre a continuing source of inspiration to him.
— South Park TV Series 1997– inspiration
Stan: Wow, cartoons are getting really dirty.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Garrison: You go to hell. You go to hell and you die.
— South Park TV Series 1997– hell
Cartman: Naw dude, independent films are those black and white hippy movies. Theyre always about gay cowboys eating pudding.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Newscaster Ned: If irony was made of strawberries, wed all be drinking a lot of smoothies right now.
— South Park TV Series 1997– irony
MTV announcer: Youre watching MTV, the cool, brainwashing, 12-year-old-and-younger station that hides behind a slick image. Were so cool that we decide whats cool. And now MTV News. The News that is single-handedly dumbing-down our country, which is cool.
— South Park TV Series 1997– sin
Leopold Butters Stotch: [Butters is holding a Barbie doll] Hey there, Butters, wanna slap my titties around? Uh, no thanks, maam. I might get in trouble again.[he puts the doll away and begins whistling]
— South Park TV Series 1997– trouble
Cartman: You so much as TOUCH kittys ass, and Ill put a firecracker in your nutsack and blow your balls all over your pants.Stan: Jesus, Cartman.Cartman: Well, Im just sayn, man, seriously, dont mess with kitty, man.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Butters: I dont want to do it if it hurts or if it makes you get all sticky.
— South Park TV Series 1997– hurt
Mr. Garrison: Dont lie, Stan. Lying makes you sterile.
— South Park TV Series 1997– you
Mrs. Marsh: Hello, Mrs. Brovlowski, this is Stans mom. I was wondering if you might know why my son is trying to split his head open with an ice pick.Stan: Aaaah. I have to get it out.
— South Park TV Series 1997– hell
Cartman: Butters, remind me to cut your balls off later.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
[repeated line]City Wok Owner: Welcome to Shitty Wok![meant as City Wok]
— South Park TV Series 1997– city
Mrs. Broflovski: WhatwhatWHAT?
— South Park TV Series 1997–
[walking up to a crucified Cartman]Officer Barbrady: T. T is for turtle.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Towelie: Im so high man, I dont think I can take it.
— South Park TV Series 1997– man
[about Jews]Priest: They crucified Our Lord and Savior. If you dont go to hell for crucifying Our Savior, then what the hell DO you go to hell for?
— South Park TV Series 1997– hell
Cartman: Well God, I guess you got me again, didnt you? Yeah, that was a good one, God. Hope it made you laugh, you sick bastard.
— South Park TV Series 1997– god
Cartman: ...my mom lied to me just like your parents lied to you and now where poor like Kennys family[Kenny walks over to comfort Cartman]Cartman: Dont touch me Kenny.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Kyle: Cartman, thats the dumbest thing youve ever said... this week.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
KKK Leader: White power! White power!Mr. Garrison: [as Mr. Hat] White power![as Mr. Garrison]Mr. Garrison: Oh, Im sorry, Chef, Mr. Hat is a racist son of a bitch.[as Mr. Hat]Mr. Garrison: Dont apologize for me to that spear chucker.[as Mr. Garrison; gasps]Mr. Garrison: Mr. Hat![runs]Mr. Garrison: Aaah!
— South Park TV Series 1997– power
Cartman: I have never in my life done anything just for the money! If Im lying may the Lord strike me down right now!Butters: Uh oh.[He slowly backs away from Cartman in fear]
— South Park TV Series 1997– life
Stan: Oh my god! They killed Kenny.Kyle: [unenthusiastically] You bastard.
— South Park TV Series 1997– god
Cartman: The rest of you go get the goods on Stan. His mom grounded him once for setting something on fire. Lets find out what that something was and then lie and say it was a puppy.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Eric Cartman: I got my period.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Mr. Slave: Oh. I never should have shoved all those poor animals up my ass.
— South Park TV Series 1997– animals
Mrs. Crabtree: Sit down or the bunny dies!
— South Park TV Series 1997– die
Chef: James Taylor, what the hell are you doing singing about prostitutes to these children? Get outta here!
— South Park TV Series 1997– children
Mr. Slave: Oh, Jesus Christ.
— South Park TV Series 1997– jesus
Terrance: Hey Phillip, guess what?Phillip: What?Terrance: [Farts] Farrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt.
— South Park TV Series 1997– art
Kyle: All animals kill, and the animals that dont kill are stupid ones like cows and turtles and stuff.
— South Park TV Series 1997– animals
Mr. Slave: Oooh, Jesuth Christht.
— South Park TV Series 1997– christ
Mr. Garrison: You little turds, you ruined my life for the last time
— South Park TV Series 1997– life
[repeated line]Stan: You know, I learned something today.
— South Park TV Series 1997– you

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